It’s nauseating and vertiginous
To be on the precipice
Of a crisis
Eminent potentiality of the nightmare in my iris
Manifestations of phantasmagoric lamentations that render me blinded
An eyeless machine, lifeless as a virus
Submerged in my own brain, my own encephalitis
A psychosis to silence all things righteous and pious

It’s nauseating and vertiginous
To be on the precipice
Of a crisis
The sensation of the wind between my toes
The thrill of being alone in the throes and thralls of consciousness
An atavistic home
A paroxysmal conviction that speeds and grows
In the thrill of being alone to chaperone your soul’s cremation
Spontaneous immolation and self-subjugation
The inmost death and the great negation, becoming slaves to sensation
Engorging our amygdala to celebrate it’s glaciation
Sobriety is just a prism of suffocating self-awareness and fruitless creation
A momentary lapse of unconsciousness realized by fears of stagnation
In short, it’s all the same shit, and that’s what terrifies me
Automation of automatons becomes motorized and renders autonomy paralyzed
Baptized in the chrism of our new industrial God a child is mechanized
In our technocratic theocracy this 12 tone song is harmonized
Smoke in my eyes
Until I can’t recognize life

It’s nauseating and vertiginous
To be on the precipice
Of a crisis
Watching your friends sprint face first off the cliff
Seeing your sins omnipresent in them
Trapped in a cycle impossible to unhinge
To maintain a feeling we maintain this binge
I’m sorry my friends I have failed you again
After all drift aparts I have learned nothing yet
My whole life I’ve been living like a Sunday in lent
As my thumbs spit bile my phone drifts past 1%
I write this verse now on a cheap paper towel with a pen
On a table next to dead flowers I had bought for my girlfriend
Listening to the sounds of the freeway at 4 AM
Trying to remember when life turned into a dead end
My mom said I always was no good at picking friends
Maybe she was right cause God’s my only friend left
And he’s about to walk out just like all the rest
I’ve spent a long time dying but I’ll never be dead
I’ll live on as the soil and the oceans instead
Irreconcilable nihilists find the time to get bread
But they can’t find the time to analyze the lies in their head
Fuck em
We were all shown the same love
The truth is the redeemer and the truth is above
The truth is in every single one of us
But for some this love is just never enough
And when your time is up
Witness the unbeholdable face of God
You have no concept of this at all
Your ignorance is contained in this omniscience
Your impotence is contained in this omnipotence
But it is not contained in you
We are the solids from the clarified butter
Something I wouldn’t dare utter
An apology as an apogee to forgive our mother
For the sake of joining with our father
But at this point I wouldn’t even bother
I’m a lamb to the slaughter
I am sons and I’m daughters
I am the salt in your tears pouring into your wounds to remind you that you’re treading water
I am the regrets locked away in your coffer
I am naked and humbled
I am stumbles and troubles
I am the seventh trumpet playing as Earth crumbles
I am afraid