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i am the ant slayer
all my actions are overlooked
all my glances are second
there is tyrannical waste in the palm of my hands
i am yolk death, daily homicide
i am josef, sato, soren, tetsu, i am donald
my name is not important
when these words emerge
you look up, inadvertently lock in
all that time spent becoming yourself
and you keep changing it all at once
fell swoops of blackened death metal
riffs that repeat several times
tenacity and fire that your life once carried
your age toils but never quite augments
at the bus stop your eyes are moons with depth unfathomable
this living we're doing is corruption
my love is pollution

my dogs are barking but i don't want to stop dancing yet
just boots and cats and move my hips
when i sit back down my stomach will ache
all feeling will escape my body
it takes you a second to recall my face
walk up the hill but you don't live there anymore
last visit i left my self defense while you were away
it was pouring, shielding deathwish with my sweater
but now i'm staring down this sunrise
it's nice and it hurts my eyes
then i wonder where you stay
i'll try to keep these things locked away
when you hear scotland i hope it moves you
sometimes there is no will to move
stop chasing happiness and it smacks me in the head
stop inhaling and i can breathe so much easier
i think it's okay to feel this much pain sometimes

alameda, you ask why be sorry
but you know there is no resolution, no solution
there is no semen in your sketches
and there are no more words for you
there is a stomach and an indention in its center
there is all my affinity, and all your pity, all your sympathy
fondness of the body with perpetual attraction to intoxication
a small hit to forget after the fact
but there is no forget
there is no let go
bovine boy can only withdraw so thoroughly
he can only retire so much passion
before all his insides get left on the inside

giant panda, i see your blood, your sanity, your avocado bare
i see you dig into the skin
i get a tiny bit frightened again
bear claws are lodged in your arm, with no one to suck the cut
blood comes to the forefront of your neck now
i hold you as close as i can
i watch you die again and again
and wonder why are you like that?
i will clear my head and i will follow suit
all my evil locked away in a coffer of memories
no one will ever see

i am reborn again, anew
there is sand between my toes
there is dirt between my fingers


from earthly conduct, released September 7, 2016



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